The End Of Tears

February 3, 2016 / cdjameson / 12 Comments

It always seems when my demons gather close I cast out my dreams and they sit before me

Try to restore me, silently implore me to see

I’m only a murderer in my mind, content with my victim, just killing time

No one could ever love me enough, to fill that need

Some have tried to call the bluff, on borrowed time I felt their touch, and still it grows colder colder

Each a dying sun that burned so bright only to be swallowed again by endless night
Welcome to the other side to the knotted tangles of my hidden life

Is it so arrogantly that I had hoped for the end of tears

For something that gets brighter when we confess all our fears
I can’t tell anymore my black from my white, mixing with colours cascading in light

Each new turn laughs at me, demands that I fight, with patience, a virtue, not given to flight

With companions, lovers, enemies, all sharing the roles, whose home do I return to, my heart feels so old.

It heads in a direction, like it always has, to a place where I’m writing and I don’t feel so bad.
Welcome to the other side to the knotted tangles of of my hidden life

And still I’ll never stop believing in the end of tears

For something that gets brighter when we confess all our fears

When You Bleed You’re Beautiful

September 30, 2015 / cdjameson / 6 Comments

Approach and state your name

Did you come here to fight

Did you come here to blame

This road is not yours this house is not mine

You’re building castles in the sand this time

I’m so tired of drawing lines

We can, can fly above them

They’ll not matter when you see them far away

One more argument you bought and sold

I’m sorry to be the one who tells you, baby, when you bleed you’re beautiful

Fall into me, hold onto me, be there, fade away, say my name, let me know

Appear, what twists and takes all your fears

Knock, knocking you, get up fall down

That familiar feel of crumbling ground

I know you’re tired of endings and beginnings

Life’s long lists of what ifs and letting gos

Just remember when we bleed we’re beautiful

Fall into me, hold onto me, let me go, be there, fade away, let me know

Little Black Box

May 4, 2015 / cdjameson / 11 Comments

My body my mind, chiseled in, fading time.
Drawn to the brink, ever I sink, into you.
Carefully crafting sermons that teach, only me, to see.

I’m so thirsty for the flames

Something to burn away, a light so bright, you’d find me.

But I’m just a little black box four square corners of recorded thoughts
My story is the telling of truth
And it’s all just a lie, a little black box without its disguise

Still every day from the wreckage of hope I drag these tortured dreams

Defy what I know to be broken

Swear what I know can’t be spoken

If for just one moment for all to see, I’d be more than these four corners, I’d be more than just me

But I’m just a little black box four square corners of recorded thoughts
My story is the telling of truth
And it’s all just a lie, a little black box without its disguise

Free

March 20, 2015 / cdjameson / 8 Comments

And now it’s time for you to run without this time a starting gun
Is it not how they told you it would be
They were singing songs of innocence before you were free
And Now you know experience a tiger that stalks inside your house
He’s been there a while now tearing up your floors showing you all those hidden doors
It’s like floyd said it’s not what you expected to see
When I looked at the tiger the tiger was me

So I run run run can’t seem to catch up with the sun
And each day I grow older just a little bit colder
But after all I wanted this wanted to be free

Are we all just dreaming of life
I wake and it’s not real
A lonely place just filled with steel
Each face passes by a glimmer of something the same
Will we ever be more than just our names
I have always been looking for that greater plan
But all the time knowing the tiger will eat the lamb

So I run run run can’t seem to catch up with the sun
And each day I grow older just a little bit colder
But after all I wanted this wanted to be free

I can feel my pulse it’s never the same
But somehow in the end comes round again
When does it all stop can you see by the veil
This tiger feels old from eating his tail
His back is broke and his mind is gone
So maybe this time we sing the song.

So we run run run can’t seem to catch up with the sun
And each day we grow older just a little bit colder
But after all we wanted this wanted to be free

Forgive Me

February 22, 2015February 22, 2015 / cdjameson / 24 Comments

Forgive me if I’ve forgotten what we argued for

We washed up here without our fear left it on the shore

It’s in each other’s arms we’re guilty wanting more

Like an old photograph you hold in your hands

Timeless till the waves melt what seemed like solid sand

Let me wake from just one more dream
Where the sun is rising and the light touches everything
An unending ending is it so much to ask
When all our time descending falls through an hour-glass

If I am no more than a blink of an eye let me fall a million ways let me feel before I die

All those friends who’ve come and gone loved ones whose memories may persist

Aren’t we all just the same leaving folded at the wrists

So please

Forgive what I am forgive what I am not forgive that I’m forgetting what should not have been forgot

Let me wake from just one more dream
Where the sun is rising and the light touches everything
An unending ending is it so much to ask
When all our time descending falls through an hour-glass

Cristina’s Song

January 30, 2015 / cdjameson / 11 Comments

I had thought this world a graceless place
Only ghosts that walked around in empty space
But instead I find, I’ve lost and found my mind,
On the bed of a friend the sound cranked to ten and only you in my eyes

Please won’t you sing to me
In that secret key that you brought from across the sea
It doesn’t need a language
It’s not like we ever did
Bliss comes to you from the bottom the sky looks beautiful from the abyss
My lover, my teacher, my savior
What a world I have seen
To leave you I have found you it’s the same as it’s always been

I would have turned my dreams to dust experience then rust
Oh how I tried to hate you better numbness than the pain
So I went to hell but you followed me all the same
And when I’d made my last denial twisted my heart made you as a rival
Where that empty space it should have been was your love your smile and a place that I could dream

So thank you friend until we meet again I wait inside this dream
I can feel you there as angels prepare one day that place for you and me
Our time was short and the distance now long but forever I will find you
Just look in this song

So Long And GoodBye

December 16, 2014December 20, 2014 / cdjameson / 20 Comments

Had a love and she ran away
Didn’t have all that much to say
I use to tell her you gotta grow up learn not to lie
To bad she listened and now its goodbye
Guess that’s the lesson when you teach you are taught
But I thought I knew that lesson guess I forgot

So long and good bye the suns never gonna set in those eyes
I wouldn’t let her go and yet now she’s gone
Wanna pull you towards me I see now that that’s wrong
If you want to love her let her go if you want to love her just let her know

Love its gonna hurt you love its gonna break you down
But it will matter what you do with all that empty sound
Laughter as it echos still matters as you fall
Hate as it grows will wait tells its lies make you so tall

Circle bound did I not learn from all that sound
Now I’m dancing with a different woman we hold each other tight
Our disguise is to good again ain’t no room for the light
I know there’s a glare from all we have done
It’s keeping me from looking you in the eyes
Got my sights on another one

I loved the chase I love the excitement of the kill
One more notch on my bedpost oh what a thrill
When I look back on all those tear-stained eyes
I wonder did I win the prize
Theres a lesson here that I forgot think my sons gonna teach me
One day when I stop

C. D. Jameson

Poetry